Have you ever prayed for a miracle? Because that’s exactly what I’m doing now. I’ve tried and failed repeatedly to take care of this particular problem myself, but often in a half-hearted way that did not go nearly far enough. And so I find myself praying on this dark and lonely morning to my benevolent God of True Love to help me do what I could never do myself. And I do mean myself, because for years and years I’ve shut out countless friends, and even family members, because I told myself they weren’t worth my bruised feelings, my guilt-ridden sense of obligation, and the invasion of privacy they represented to me. Rationally, I know these were not faults of theirs, but rather, the fault of my own hopeless attitudes. So I pray now that not only will True Love take away my biggest problem, but it will also show me a whole new way of relating to the world. One where I am not so uncomfortable or mistrustful around people. One where I don’t perceive walls or barriers all around me, separating me from the rest of humanity. One where I can look myself in the eyes anytime, and feel grateful for the person I’ve become, rather than ashamed of the secrets I’ve been hiding. In the abstract, I understand that True Love only wants me to be my simple, natural self — nothing fancy, nothing artificial. So in some ways, the solution to my problem is ridiculously easy: just don’t do all the desperate and destructive things I’ve been doing to avoid facing myself. But I need True Love to show me the way, and to be there when I ask for what I’ve wanted all along… a source of love I can turn to, anytime. ❤️‍🔥—Y.B.D.